Who Reads Those Anyway?

The following is part of a EULA (End user license agreement)…you know, those really long things no-one reads before installing software. Yea, everyone just clicks “I agree” Well this one comes from the McAfee website when installing the Firewall Trial. Right smack in the middle was something I’ve never seen before. (In red for your convenience.)

5. NO WARRANTIES. THE SOFTWARE IS PROVIDED "AS-IS" WITHOUT ANY WARRANTY WHATSOEVER. YOU ASSUME ALL RISKS AND RESPONSIBILITIES FOR SELECTION OF THE SOFTWARE TO ACHIEVE YOUR INTENDED RESULTS, AND FOR THE INSTALLATION OF, USE OF, AND RESULTS OBTAINED FROM THE SOFTWARE. THE COMPANY MAKES NO WARRANTY THAT THE SOFTWARE WILL BE ERROR FREE OR FREE FROM INTERRUPTION OR FAILURE, OR THAT IT IS COMPATIBLE WITH ANY PARTICULAR HARDWARE OR SOFTWARE. TO THE MAXIMUM EXTENT PERMITTED BY APPLICABLE LAW, THE COMPANY DISCLAIMS ALL WARRANTIES, EITHER EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO IMPLIED WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE, AND NONINFRINGEMENT WITH RESPECT TO THE SOFTWARE AND THE ACCOMPANYING WRITTEN MATERIALS. SOME STATES DO NOT ALLOW LIMITATIONS ON IMPLIED WARRANTIES, SO THE ABOVE LIMITATION MAY NOT APPLY TO YOU. YOU HEREBY ACKNOWLEDGE THAT THE SOFTWARE MAY NOT BE AVAILABLE OR BECOME UNAVAILABLE DUE TO ANY NUMBER OF FACTORS INCLUDING, WITHOUT LIMITATION, PERIODIC SYSTEM MAINTENANCE, SCHEDULED OR UNSCHEDULED, ACTS OF GOD, TECHNICAL FAILURE OF THE SOFTWARE, TELECOMMUNICATIONS INFRASTRUCTURE, OR DELAY OR DISRUPTION ATTRIBUTABLE TO VIRUSES, DENIAL OF SERVICE ATTACKS, INCREASED OR FLUCTUATING DEMAND, ACTIONS AND OMISSIONS OF THIRD PARTIES, OR ANY OTHER CAUSE REASONABLY BEYOND THE CONTROL OF THE COMPANY. THEREFORE, THE COMPANY EXPRESSLY DISCLAIMS ANY EXPRESS OR IMPLIED WARRANTY REGARDING SYSTEM AND/OR SOFTWARE AVAILABILITY, ACCESSIBILITY, OR PERFORMANCE.

That’s right, you’re screwed if God decides to mess with your software. I always thought that firewalls were part of mankind’s quest against evil, but I guess even God likes to hack every now and then. Which really sucks considering He can smite your computer until it is nothing more than smoldering silicon.